Focus on Efforts, Not Results
Remember when we defined success? Success is deciding to succeed and striving toward that goal. You are already successful when you’ve decided to achieve a goal and make an effort toward it. Yes!
An off schedule post
This is an off-schedule post. That means something different or interesting is going on that warrants paying attention to. So, my friends, read on to find out more!
Introduction
It’s always nice when we can win the prize. Reach our goal. Cross the finish line. But then what? Perhaps, if you are especially disciplined, you will immediately set the next goal to strive for. Today, I hope to convince you that when you decide to succeed and then make efforts toward that goal, you’ve already won. Read on and find out why!
Success Defined
When you take my course…Do you like the way I said that? I said “when,” and not “if,” as you have already made a decision to do it. And the reason I do this is to encourage you to make a decision today to learn all you can, so you can…Achieve your dreams and live your best life! You know what they say, right? A journey of a thousand miles starts with the first step. How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. You know what I’m saying here…
OK, now that the commercial is over, what I'm getting at is that when you take the course, read my book, or simply read these blog posts long enough, you will, at some point, learn the definition of success. I’ve put it out there several times, but let’s review it again:
Success is defined as the progressive realization of a worthy ideal (Note 1)
Now, you really do want to take a minute to click the link in Note 1 to get a full understanding of what success is. As you watch the video, you will realize it says nothing about reaching the finish line, retiring when you want to, or achieving a certain financial milestone.
Success is making the effort toward your goal, not necessarily attaining it. That’s a very important distinction and, frankly, contrary to what we’ve either been taught or observed to be true. Reaching the goal is the ultimate purpose, but the growth and the learning are the important parts of the process, not the final achievement. I trust you understand that, as it’s an important concept. Stop for a second to ponder that thought. It’s important that you grasp it.
Let’s dig a little deeper and consider another accomplished person’s view of success.
Detach from outcomes to be successful
This subtitle is just a little spin on a chapter from the book Approval Addiction by Steve Siebold (Note 2), in a chapter titled “Detach from Outcomes.” Let me just say: if you don’t own this book, you should immediately click the link in Note 2 to buy it, because it’s full of sage advice you really want to learn and retain for the future. I own several books by Steve Siebold, and I find myself pulling them off the shelf to reference quite often. Each of his books is full of excellent, timeless wisdom and contains information that will help you on your journey. Check them out by clicking on the links in Notes 3 and 4.
The theme of detaching from outcomes is not to worry about seeking others' approval, but to determine your own path and blaze it regardless of what others may say or think.
Here are some of the main points from the chapter referenced above:
Your true power comes from detaching from outcomes and focusing on effort and growth
Why does it matter?
You eliminate wild emotional swings based on when things go right and when they go wrong
Your mood will level out, eliminating the roller coaster of highs and lows
You don’t want to chase approval from others who have no control over your individual efforts
When you focus on effort and growth:
You own the only things you truly control, such as your actions, mindset, and learning
You build resilience by focusing on and valuing progress, not perfection
You create a growth mindset that feeds continuous improvement and self-confidence
·You reclaim your individual power by detaching from outcomes by:
Setting execution goals around what you can control. For example, completing your project on time is a step toward getting a promotion as opposed to simply stating getting a promotion
Celebrate small wins along the way instead of waiting for a big opportunity
Be mindful and present in the now. You can’t change the past, and the future will come soon enough
Reframe failure as feedback (Note 5)
Detach from affirmations. Remind yourself that you are enough regardless of what happens (Note 6).
The bottom line
Humans are social beings; we typically enjoy being around others, and we want to be liked. That’s fine until we worry so much about being like that that it interferes with taking the necessary actions to truly gain what we want. Those last two sentences were a mouthful. Let me give you some examples of what I mean:
If you are a college student, and you’ve been invited to go out tonight. You politely decline because you should stay in and study this evening for a test or project due tomorrow rather than going out with friends tonight.
If you are a manager at work, you have, after doing all the research and homework, determined to take a particular action to improve the department. When you discuss the proposed action with your peers, they dissuade you, saying, “Why take the risk to your career or make extra work for yourself?”
You are out with your friends, and the driver has had a little too much to drink to drive home safely. You ask for his keys and call an Uber. He rejects your efforts to protect himself and others and tells you, “You’re not my father!”
You are a parent, and your young child’s friend asks him to go out and play. You deny your child’s request to go out, even after you asked him to do his homework. Instead of working, he was playing video games. He complains and tells you are not fair. He may even say he hates you! We’re having fun now, huh?
Your twenty-something child fails out of college, refuses to get a job, or makes no progress toward becoming a responsible adult after repeated discussions of your expectations. He or she may even be abusing drugs or alcohol. He suffers from Failure to Launch Syndrome (Note 7). You give him six months to move out of the house. Yeah, this is the real challenge in life: implementing Tough Love (Note 8) for your children.
I’ll say this about that: Doing the right thing is always the right thing. If you have determined that the course you are going to take is in your best interest, the best interest of your children or family, or your organization at work, and the action is legal and moral, then move on and don’t worry about what others will think. This is what it takes to be bold and take calculated risks. Remember the old phrases: Noting ventured, nothing gained? The future belongs to the bold. No risk, no reward.
Summary
Here’s all you need to do: Show up every day, give your best, don’t worry about setbacks (because setbacks are part of any growth), don’t worry about what others say, keep growing, work your plan, and keep advancing toward your long-term goals. When you do, you are in full control of your future and your success. No worries about what others think or how they act. Be confident and be bold!
That’s all for today!
Let’s help our friends and loved ones, shall we?
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Then, simply say, “Search the internet for Afterburner Success Partners
to learn how to achieve your dreams and live your best life!”
Focus on efforts, not results
Afterburner Success Partners
What’s in it for Me
The best thing you can do to live your best life is to be in control of it. That means having a realistic plan and executing it. I hope you have not experienced, and do not experience, any of the conditions I described above. In some cases, it may take professional help, but if you desire to overcome any adverse effects of these issues, you are on the road to bettering yourself.
Call to Action
What do you need to do today?
Recommended Resources
Click the links in the notes below and read them. Buy and read Achieve Your Dreams: A Complete Guide to Live Your Best Life by David Giustozzi (Note 9). Take the course, it’s a very inexpensive investment in yourself.
Up Next
Back to regular posting schedule.
Notes
Please note that as an Amazon Affiliate, I may earn a small commission on the sale of any of these recommended resources.
What is Success with Bob Proctor: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P2juRja05HU
Approval Addiction by Steve Siebold: https://amzn.to/3ZnL8jg
How Rich People Think by Steve Siebold:https://amzn.to/3RKTSfm
Secrets of the World Class by Steve Siebold:https://amzn.to/4k4apY0
We have discussed this tactic in the past. When Jalan Hurts, the quarterback of the Philadelphia Eagles football team, lost the 2023 Super Bowl to Kansas City, when asked how he felt, he stated: “I either win, or I learn.” This is exactly what we are talking about.
In the same way, Jesus died for you and me, even though we do not deserve it: “for while we were still helpless, at the right time, Christ died for the ungodly.” (Romans 5:8) With a Savior like that on our side, why worry about what others think or say?
Failure to Launch Syndrome: Signs, Causes, and Treatment for Young Adults: https://lighthouserecoverytx.com/symptoms-of-failure-to-launch/
What to Do When Your Adult Child Is Messing Up, Parent Cue:https://theparentcue.org/what-to-do-when-your-adult-child-is-messing-up/
Achieve Your Dreams: A Complete Guide to Live Your Best Life by David Giustozzi: https://amzn.to/3IxEFgy
Everyday Cooking for Everyday People Like Us, by David Giustozzi: https://amzn.to/437OhVQ